Most people want the kind of relationship that their friends will envy. TO create this type of relationship requires work from both sides. Part of creating this amazing type of relationship is making open communication a priority, engaging each other on a very deep level, and dedicating time simply to being together. This can be done any time, but a date night is the ideal setting for focused attention on one another. You can take the time to discuss thoughts, feelings, ideas, reservations, and outright fears. Relationships are constantly evolving, just as we are as people. We need to work hard to stay connected as this evolution occurs.
The best way to connect is to write out questions on paper and then take turns asking each and truly listening as the answer is shared. Both people should answer before moving on to another question. Take time to answer honestly, keeping things fun and light. This type of connection should be paired with emotional and physical connections as you enjoy the presence of one another. Several questions are shared below. Make it a game by putting one question on each slip of paper and drawing one out at a time. There is no need to rush or try to get through everything, just enjoy the experience.
- What movie most reminds you of us?
- Have I done anything in the last few months that has seriously upset you?
- Which of your parents do you like the most?
- How do you think I enrich your life?
- Is there something you have always wanted to ask me but haven’t because the answer might be scary?
- When did you know you loved me?
- When you are obviously upset, would you rather me talk to you or give you space for a while?
- Were you raised with beliefs you do not believe in now?
- What in our relationship makes you happiest?
- What do you most enjoy doing with me?
- When do you or what makes you feel the most alive?
- What is your favorite physical/sexual memory of us as a couple?
- When do you feel most loved by me?
- Do I compliment you enough?
- When we are with friends, do I make you feel like a priority?
- What is the most anxious you have ever felt? How did you manage?
- Where and how can I help you feel more supported?
- Have you ever been obsessed with a topic? What was your obsession?
- Did you ever skip school? Were you caught?
- What is one sexual fantasy we have never explored?
- If you could live anywhere in the world for a year, where would it be?
- What would you do with an extra $1000?
These are just a few of the potential questions to get you started. Once you get started, it gets easier to come up with your own. Write out some you think of to add to the list. The goal is to get to know each other in new and fun ways. The time you invest in activities such as these will always be time well spent.